So this is a conversation that happened today between someone who is in no way a medical professional, me, and my brain:
So your doctor doesn’t know what’s causing your headaches?
Not really, but they’ve run all sorts of tests. I just started a new medication.
I think you need to take some time to focus on you.
Who is it that you think I focus on…?
You should really start exercising.
Excuse me?
That was bold.
I had some headaches once and it really helped me.
Oh.
I see where this is going.
You know, just start walking or something. I think it would help take your mind off your head pain.
And on my hip pain…?
Have you considered it might be stress?
I’ve had a headache for 8 months. Straight. Yeah, I’ve thought of that.
Yes.
How do you feel about prescription medications?
I’m on six of them.
Do you seriously think I’m not taking anything???
You should be taking Xanax.
Umm…
That’s so weird… You don’t LOOK like my neurologist…
It would really help you relax.
I see.
*looks around the room* who are you talking to??
Seriously. Ask your doctor about Xanax.
You don’t look like my T.V. either… I’m pretty sure if my doctor wanted me to take Xanax, he’d prescribe it…
You are just way too stressed.
Thank you for trying to help.
Have you even met me…?
I don’t even know what to say about that.